Monday, May 4, 2009

Ego dissolving

Hokey sh*t, here's another huge thing from the same book:

The ego having been fully dissolved is not the same as awakening.

Many wake up, permanently or not, before the ego is dissolved, and the awakening accelerates the process explosively. But the ego may still be there, in fact it can even be a very strong ego, and fight the dissolving process tooth and nail.

This fits my experience so much, and it seems to be one of the few things missing from The Disappearance Of The Universe. In that book the end of the ego seems to be totally identified with Awakening, and it does not make sense to me, because so many people who are clearly awakened also clearly have ego.

What Adya says may explain what happened to me: it might be that I had not just a brief awakening in 1986, but a permanent one (I'm not at all sure, though), but it was obscured by a fantastically strong ego, which has been painfully being dismantled every since, accompanied not the least by crippling fear. It can still be difficult at times, but I'm pretty sure I'm close to the end of fear. I hope very close! :-)

8 comments:

Tim said...

Eolake, when you say "Many people are clearly Awakened", what does that look like - I mean, what are the criteria?

eolake said...

That's tough issue. But I go not by their personality, which seems to be irrelevant, but by how they describe their experience of awakening.

Tim said...

Sure. So how would that description sound - do you have any examples? (Online preferably.)

eolake said...

I don't know where to find it online, but the description from Adyashanti, Byron Katie, and Eckhart Tolle seem to fit.

Tim said...

Yeah. They fit with what I would *imagine* "it" would be like :)

eolake said...

There are also several descriptions in the little book "Everyday Enlightenment: Seven Stories of Awakening".

http://tr.im/kpV0

Many of them seem to have quite a bit of ego, but mostly the experiences sound genuine to me.

Anonymous said...

I remember Kenneth Wapnick saying on one of his cds that you don't chip away at the ego. It is always there 100% and your right mind is always there. It comes down to where you spend your time. As you become more and more aware of the truth you spend mor time in your right mind and less time in your ego mind.

eolake said...

Thanks.