Monday, April 26, 2010

Meta wakes in the night

This is from a book I wrote years ago, Sugar Domino:


Meta was woken by Miriam moving about in her sleep, and decided to go sleep alone in a small guest chamber nearby. She pulled her blankets after her, and walked into the little room, and threw herself on the bed. The moon was showing its old face at her through the window, and she sent it a friendly thought.

The silence of the night was overwhelming. The usual physical and mental noise had quieted down, and the mind could hear itself think again. She could hear the world think, and the world could hear her think. The earthworms burrowing in the soil were doing a little moonlighting, and the old owl outside was blinking at her.

She felt a touch of something she really didn't believe in, she got up from the bed and went on her forehead and knees on the carpet, she couldn't explain it to herself, it just seemed right.She felt a connection to something... something big, something really, really big, something infinitely kind, and almost, but not quite all-knowing.

She trembled. This felt ridiculous; she was definitely not a religious person.

Still, there it was. And Meta chose to trust her senses, mostly because she also had a sense of happiness, of intense, floating, joyful happiness. And the happiness was not connected to any strings or ties, and it was no delirium, no lies or walls connected to it, she could see everything better than ever, and she understood everything better than ever, and she liked everything better than ever.

Meta meowed quietly to herself and put her hands under her forehead, trying as best she could to reach outwards, to be worthy of this, and to position herself for making something of it in the future. She had no idea what that might be, but she was positive that it could be something great.

Something warm and something beautiful. Something knowledgeable, too.

She was suddenly freezing at the same time she was warmer than ever. She almost withdrew, but then in a flash realized that this was simply the fear of freedom that all creatures had always felt when they had known only entrapment for so long that they had forgotten everything else. The unknown is always the primary fear. But it need not be, the unknown is only unknown until it has been seen.

Meta felt warm again. She sat on the carpet, her back against the wall, and wondered for a while. She had an odd feeling that the future would not be like the past. She looked at the stray clouds idling past the moon and sent them a happy thought also, telling them to say hello where they were going.

(The funny thing is that it's an erotic novel, but these kinds of things kept sneaking themselves into it. - Eolake :-)
(Get it on paper or as ebook.)

Friday, April 23, 2010

Fighting the Devil

A friend of mine said that Satan would want us all to be more tolerant so he can have free reign.

Well. What happens if we stop fighting the devil is one of two:

1: he wins.

2: The fight disappears and everybody wins, because the devil was part of us.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

The Flame Within

The Flame Within
There is a flame that burns brightly and deeply hidden within. It is weakening to the outer man and it cripples us for any activity outside of God's will. Every now and then the oil of grace is poured onto this flame and we see suddenly and with great lucidity, the stunning work that had been going on within, and we take courage and renew our total direction to that One Thing from a new rung of gratefulness . But for the most part, and for long long stretches, the work is hidden and weakening to the outer faculties and continuously humbling to ego. Keep going, keep going, keep going! it seems to say, and how incredibly blessed we are if we listen without giving in to doubt. The day is coming when the work will be over, or, by so many proofs, nearing its end, and the joy and lightness of our spirits then is such that all we can do some days is laugh.


Thursday, April 15, 2010


Of course there is no formula for success except perhaps an unconditional acceptance of life and what it brings.
-- Arthur Rubinstein

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Where we go

We go where our vision is.
-- Joseph Murphy

Saturday, April 10, 2010


Seeing ourselves as others see us would probably confirm our worst suspicions about them.
-- Franklin P. Adams

Friday, April 9, 2010

What we could become

The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become.
-- Charles Du Bos